Kyle is Santa DLC

In the cold, barren midwinter, a sole figure rises from his slumber. Kyle, readying his day, looks on that which he will encounter. . . OH MY GOODNESS, WHY ARE THERE ELVES GROWING OUT OF HIS SKIN? WHO GAVE THAT CHILD A CHILD A CLAYMORE??? WHY IS RACHEL TURNING INTO A PUSS LUMP OF FLESH????