My Bones Reviews

This game is laggy, boring and overall not a game. Even as a joke game to play with your friends, you won't find any fun in this. WHO PUTS A FUCKING KEY LITERALLY 3 FEET FROM A LOCKED GATE!? WHAT IS EVEN THE POINT?!

Was checking out the listings for the Steam Deck and The Count, sitting behind me, said, "I would use that to play My Bones!" I asked, "What is My Bones?" To which he replied, "I don't know. I bet there's a game called My Bones." Believe it or not, there is a game called My Bones. Can't believe they did that.

[h1]Reasonably well packed pile of nothing[/h1] So... What to say about this game... Here's a few things: Pros: [list] [*]The surroundings were reasonably well made. [*]For about two minutes, the combination of the background music and surroundings actually gave me a genuine feeling of, if not fear, at least tension. I was actually expecting for something to jump at me. [/list] Cons: [list] [*]Nothing ever did jump at me... [*]The game felt extremely laggy and a few times I couldn't advance through a gate before going back a few steps and trying again once the gate was "fully loaded" ( =opened) [*]The game is just way too dark, and I don't mean it as a genre. The lighting is horrible, and it's impossible to see where you're going unless you're sporting the flashlight at all times. Why make having the flashlight on an option if it's this difficult to find your way without it? [*]Immediately after starting the game, and all the way through it, I was assaulted by an ENORMOUS amount of very simple grammatical errors and just general bad English. I'd expect at least the script of a game to be somewhat readable before having to pay for it... [*]The story makes absolutely no sense. Like none at all... [*]The game was SHORT. Okay, so it says it's short in the description, but I was expecting to get at least an hour or two of... can't really call this entertainment, so let's go with... stuff... [/list] TLDR: This game, no matter how low a price a measly 2€ is, is not worth it.

My Bones is an absolutely terrible game. It's one of the worst horror games I have had the pleasure of playing. My Bones starts with a screen with a man talking about how he killed his family and then you wake up in hell and have to find a way out of there. If that sentence confused you and you still don't know what the game is about, well then join the club as I still don't really know what the game is about. The game is so poorly translated and some of the English grammar is flat out wrong it doesn't make sense, which makes the story impossible to follow. Gameplay wise as I said, you wake up in a cemetery which is located in hell and then you look for keys to advance through the game. That is all you do. There's no enemies to avoid, absolutely nothing making this game absolutely boring to play. The graphics are all horrible. The textures pop in frequently, the models look absolutely horrendous. To note this game was made in FPS creator or GameGuru as it's now known (AKA the engine which supplies all the indie garbage that passes through Greenlight) . This game is also prone to crashing, but don't worry cause you can finish the game in under 10 minutes. I'm dead serious. To extend the play value you can play through and get both endings (there's two of them), but for me the GOOD ending is bugged and no matter what I tried I can seem to finish it with the good ending, so bad ending it is. In the end My Bones is absolute trash. There's nothing redeeming about it. It's not scary, the story is not good, but the best part of My Bones is that you can laugh your ass off from the grammar mistakes. Also the developer released quite a few horror games on steam which I will cover soon and they're all the same, which is why he is one of the developers you should avoid on steam. Final Rating: 1/10 Pros: N/A Cons: - Short - Not Scary - Broken - English grammar mistakes make the story hard to follow

Key to door simulator. There isn't any sort of story here really....or at least, it's indistinct due to what I assume is a terrible translation. The actual game looked and sounded cool. There is a monster, but it does nothing. It offers you a morality choice for no apparent reason. Basically, you just wander around finding keys to unlock doors while reading some terribly translated notes and taking in the admittedly cool looking grisly scenery...and then the game ends by letting you know that you are either cool with being in hell or have escaped hell by being given a second chance, although the game is also not really clear on what you really did. Presumably you killed your family, but one of the notes suggests that your wife actually killed you despite the fact that you killed her (and this is a great example of what a terrible translation can do to your story, lol). Why you would be given a second chance is indistinct. Also, there is a note that states that a monster is sealed in the church crypt with somebody acting as the watcher, and tells the watcher to flee if the monster escapes, lol. Anyway, the story wasn't really something that made any sort of sense. The common thread between the stuff you find was either left out or wasn't thought out well enough to include in the first place. This actually had the potential to be a pretty cool and creepy game, but in practice, it failed miserably. After 10 or 15 minutes, you will have finished the game and will be left wondering what you had just been doing. You will definitely feel zero compulsion to bother playing a second time to witness the other ending (you have a generic good and bad ending available). Also, the game is laggy as hell. I wouldn't really bother unless you are bored and cant decide what to play. Definitely dont pay more than 10 or 20 cents for this one. 9 failed expectations out of 10 (do the math for my rating). [code]If you found this review helpful and would be interested in supporting my Curator group, it would be appreciated. Cheers. https://store.steampowered.com/curator/32549618/[/code]

It's extremely short (I finished it in 17 minutes). Lacks basic english grammar (come on dude, learn some basics or at least find someone who can help you with english). Whenever I come close to any of the corpses and close in on a checkpoint fps drops to a lovely 15. The story contradicts itself. During the intro it's explained that the guy was possed and didn't know what he did but during the game and at the end it's stated that he's in hell for what he did and he somehow is okay with it although he had no control over what he did. Needs volume controls (the dungeon part got very loud). Only good thing about this game is the decent atmosphere.

Pros - They said the game was short. It was short. +for Honesty Cons -Key system, find a key to everything -I found 1 enemy, and he just stood there. I even walked up to him, and he did not do anything. -Again it was short. -I'm out of thins to say, because there was not much to go on. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I'm actually quite sad to be giving this a thumbs down because it contained at least two minutes of genuine, well manufactured tension but, uh... well: "I loved him better than all, I did not expect that he will go crazy and kill me with an axe. But I love it all smooth." Could you possibly take the drugs AFTER you write the script next time, please? Bemusement and mild terror for your viewing pleasure: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G08wVn-qE2I

I can't believe i paid for this. It's not a game, it's not a story, it's .... pseudophilosopher on heavy drugs.... Worst thing ever, you should be ashamed selling this... Not worth money, not worth time. And story is baaaaad, really, really bad.

This game was very short. I believe that I cloched about 10 minutes for my playthrough. There was a period of about 2 minutes of solid tension that could have been excellent, but the rest of the game was pretty rough. Pros - developers were honest about length 20% of the time played was pretty excellent in its tension building Cons- Too short for any sort of purchase Grammer was terrible....and WAY too much exposition. There was actually an arrow on the wall of an ancient church that directed you in the correct path. This game is going to be murdered on youtube.