77p egg: Eggwife Reviews

A B S O L U T E C I N E M A

i will need to unpack this in therapy

what the fuck do i even say about this game no seriously i genuinely dont know help

Had high hopes but got boring and annoying after a bit. Not worth 5 dollars maybe 0.50 cents instead

this fukcking makes me so god damn motion sick after a while like jesus chris

A spiritual successor to that memory of discovering Postal 2 when you were 13, as if it were made by someone age 13. Eggwife is deceptively jank, but it's clearly intentional. There's genuinely some good game design hidden under a veneer of potty humor, bad level geometry, and general poor presentation. It's gross, crass, and has the scent of genuine schizophrenia that only an actual furry developer can provide. Oh also it's nauseatingly British. *spits*

this game IS super fun despite how it looks. bombastic levels keep one-upping each other

I can see some people enjoying 77p egg: Eggwife, and clearly some do, but honestly it wasn’t my cup of tea and I have some criticisms I think go beyond personal preference. The Gameplay is a bit of a mixed bag. I found the weapons to be unique, varied, and fun to use; of all the elements of the gameplay I think the weapons and their one-of-a-kind mechanics stand out the best. Movement isn’t terrible, your character is swift and precision jumping is generally pretty good. This does lead to a major complaint of mine though, the level design. Sometimes it is not bad, other times it is absolutely terrible. I know this is supposed to be a wacky world, but good lord some of these maps have an esoteric design that I hate. This is all compounded with the crazy art style makes things hard to navigate and understand. What is even worse though is that towards the end there are these large areas that have very little to them beyond being a spectacle and it just took me out of the gameplay. Another weakness is the enemies. There are a few that are pretty good, but most of the time they are annoying, and the spaces that you are in only work somewhat well with them as they can feel somewhat haphazardly placed. All of that said though, when everything comes together some fun fights can occur. I did enjoy the cow boss in the game too, it was frustrating for a bit, but when I figured out the puzzles it all came together. Puzzle bosses are nice and we need more of them. Beyond all of that, I would say that the game is a bit too short and I am not sure it really needed a cliffhanger, the menus are a bit annoying (though clearly intentionally), and the vehicles feel terrible. All of this combines together to create an experience that is sometimes fun and other times grueling. The biggest reason I can’t recommend the game is the story and world. If you like absurdity, gross-out humor, excessive cursing, and sexual crassness then this might be for you, but I find it too excessive, especially the gross-out humor. I am not opposed to crude games, I love Conker’s Bad Fur Day for example, but it just didn’t work here for me. I think when crude humor is too egregious and omnipresent it loses a lot of its value. The funniest crude humor I have ever experienced is that which is unexpected it gives a shock that I think adds a lot to the joke. Beyond that aspect, the game’s plot is rough, to say the least. Moving from finding a new eggwife into a story about a cult that appears to be bringing about an apocalypse gave me some whiplash. It’s hard to follow and nonsensical, and perhaps some may find that charming, but I couldn’t find any reason to get invested. What I did find interesting and like though is that it seemed that this game is either British or British-influenced, I love seeing little bits of other people’s world, it may seem inconsequential to most people but I love seeing things from other cultures even if it is really simple stuff. Sound design was another sore spot for me. The game can get quite cluttered with noise and have really loud moments that just are uncomfortable to deal with which is just kind of terrible mixing. Some of the sound effects aren’t great either, the weapons are decent, but repetitive noises like the walking are quite annoying. What is easily the worst thing in the entire game though is the main character’s voice. It is pitched up to a point where it is just damn annoying and the moment the character spoke at the beginning of the game, I had one of those “uh-oh” moments and knew I was going to be dealing with an annoying game. I will note however that the music wasn’t bad especially the combat music, strong metal music for fights is always appreciated by me. So at least it is not all bad. After everything I have said you may think that I am annoyed by and hate the graphics, but that is not the case; in fact, the graphics are what made me want to grab the game. The rough, wacky, and simple feel to it all intrigues me. I think that experimental and odd stuff like this is cool to look at and experience; it all had this surrealistic vibe that I enjoy. Now, it is less than perfect; I do think that when a lot is going on in a fight it gets to be too much, but with a game like this I think that is kind of inevitable. As mentioned earlier the art makes the world design and map navigation quite annoying at times as well. But I appreciate wacky and experimental graphics, I will pick this look over the same Unity/Unreal assets copied and pasted a billion times in shovelware games any day. Plus it all ran very smoothly even in the most cluttered of scenes for me which was a nice bonus. So, as strange as it may sound, I like how ugly this duckling is, it is fun. All-in-all I can’t recommend the game, but I can see why it has received positive reviews. If you like crude insanity with functional yet flawed gameplay I think that you can have a great time, and it is probably worth you buying the game. As for me, this was a bit of a mixed experience. I don’t hate the game; I just don’t like it. It has a very unique character to it all, but that can’t carry it above the flaws that I see in the game. Still, it was a neat and unique experience even if I can’t recommend it.

Realistic simulation of what it's like to live in UK. Game's pretty shitty though.